I’ve been doing a lot of work recently both preparation and development across a range of areas both from a technical side in the sense of building my programming skills and also from a level of emotional development for my trading. I came across this today while reading a book called Letting Go and it is the second of which by the same author that I’ve read recently:
“Feelings are the accumulation of thoughts that ultimately come from attachment to an idea or an outcome so what is the outcome that I’m attached to that’s causing the problem”
This is very similar in theme I feel too what Ed Seykota deals with in the Trading tribe which is basically that if you don’t deal with your frustrations they will tend to come out as losses in your trading and mistakes that you repeat.
The book that I am reading is by David Hawkins who has some fantastic insights mixed in with some quite strange theories. The good parts in my view is that the theories can be ignored but the observations are quite valuable for dealing with emotions. He has a table which deals with different emotions and mental States ranking them from most negative to most positive. I printed it out and put it on the wall near my computer so I have a reminder there of when I’m feeling a negative emotion to look at an emotion further up the chart then identify what I would need to be thinking in order to feel that emotion.
To give you an example when I’m feeling angry about not having enough time to do something I feel is important then one of the emotions further up the chart is courage. Now you might be thinking how can I translate courage into an action when it’s me who is losing my time to somebody else. The answer is that it takes courage from me to put someone else first and connected to that are some of the other emotions further up the charts such as willingness, acceptance, reason and love.
Now whilst you might think this is all a bunch of explaining away not getting a result with emotions and that it’s unproductive – the key takeaway is to not hold onto the anger, to accept that I have made the choice to prioritise doing something for someone else, it could have the benefit of not feeling guilty for being selfish which leads to pressure to make money from that specific trade (justifying my selfishness – it’s ok I made money, it was worth it) and I also don’t try to squeeze in a trade a bit later to ‘catch up’. It’s all just about building a complete acceptance that I’ve missed this trade opportunity and that’s OK because I did something meaningful for someone else and in the end, for me.